for serious
by ohwhatsherface
Summary: FugakuMikoto, MinatoKushina. In which we learn why Naruto and Sasuke are idiots, 'seriously' is overused, and lovers spat.


She felt like the Queen of the World.

Why wouldn't she?

The jounin exams had just gone by and she had passed with flying colors.

She got her haircut the other day therefore _no split ends_!

Her mother had _just_ made a chocolate cake – even better, she was eating said chocolate-y goodness.

And best of all—

"So what are you and your Boy Toy doing for Valentine's Day?"

Alright.

Maybe not the _Queen_…

The eighteen-year-old rolled her eyes and huffed slightly as she stabbed her fork into the cake.

Kushina smirked at her friend's reaction.

"Ne, Mikoto-chan?" the redhead prodded.

Mikoto pursed her lips tightly at the thought of the upcoming holiday – the one that was _in two days_. The last time she had spoken to her boyfriend had been that morning when they trained – and sigh, _just_ trained – together. She herself was curious as to her boyfriend's plans.

So subtly, in the middle of kunai-throwing and fire-breathing, she had asked him what he was going to be doing on _Thursday_ – Valentine's Day – in hope of a reaction like: "_Well, baby"—_Okay, maybe not necessarily 'baby'—"_I'll be spending it with _you_, of course. I'm gonna make you dinner and give you roses and chocolates and—",_ but Mikoto's luck said otherwise, and her reaction was more of something along the lines of:

"_I have a mission."_

—To which she proceeded to gape at him until he continued,

"_What?"_

Mikoto's expression darkened as she remembered that training session.

"Bastard," she hissed under her breath.

Because really—

"How _dare_ he forget it's Valentine's Day?!"

"What?" Kushina blinked at the outburst and then frowned. "He _forgot_?"

"Yes!" Mikoto yelled, slapping the table, letting out her inner frustrations. "He _forgot_ it's going to be Valentine's Day on Thursday!"

"Seriously?"

"Seriously!"

"_Seriously_?!"

"SERIOUSLY!"

Kushina gawked at her and Mikoto nodded back.

"No. Freaking. _Way_!" the redhead muttered, thoroughly offended by the action of her Best Friend's Boyfriend.

"Way," Mikoto growled back.

The pair fell backwards on Mikoto's bed with a thump and the dark-haired girl buried her face in her friend's shoulder sulkily, to which Kushina proceeded to pat her head gently.

"This is serious," Kushina whispered.

Mikoto snorted.

"Seriously."

* * *

**for serious  
**written by: ohwhatsherface

This is another play at what I am having fun calling The Original Fantastic Four.  
I was going to use this on V-Day, for allurement, but I never got around to finishing it until now…

WARNING: total lameness, too much paralleling, overusing the 'seriously', and a terrible, _terrible_ ending

* * *

As she made her way to Ichiraku the next day, where she knew for a fact she would find her stalker – er, Minato – and then in turn, his Best-Friend-Slash-Rival, Kushina raised her head high, ready to take on the oh-so aristocratic and arrogant Fugaku Uchiha because _it was on_.

"You," she hissed when she pushed aside the curtain to the ramen shop.

She paused momentarily in what was to be the beginning of her tirade to smile kindly at the shop owner and his son, and order herself a bowl of Chicken Ramen, then point to Minato and say he was paying for her.

"You," Kushina repeated.

Fugaku coolly raised an eyebrow at her.

"Me?" he inquired tonelessly.

Minato proceeded to smile at her adoringly.

"Us!" encouraged the hopeful blond.

He nodded to himself because _someday_, Kushina would realize that he was awesome and that they should be together and then they would live somewhat happily ever after where he would be Hokage and they would have an adorable son who would look just like him – and hey, maybe a daughter that looked like her, and then she would a Milf and—

"Stop talking," Fugaku muttered.

Kushina rolled her eyes at them and then stepped in between where the two boys were sitting to grab at Fugaku's collar. The Uchiha merely let her do so, staring at her with an apathetic expression that still managed to make him look scary.

"How can you be so stupid?!"

The Uchiha looked back at her nonchalantly as she went on with her tirade.

"I mean, freaking _seriously_!" she roared.

She pointed to the left and they both looked at the smiling blond.

"I bet even a complete _moron_ like _Minato_ knows what tomorrow is!"

Minato felt awkward with the attention suddenly on him.

Right.

"Uh…" The blond swallowed. "It's… Thursday?"

Kushina flashed him a sweet yet fake smile before giving him a soft punch—

"Ow!"

—of encouragement on the shoulder.

"Very good, Minato," she hissed through her grin. "I'm glad you know your days of the bloody week. Do you know what this Thursday is _specifically_?"

Fugaku smirked at the blond.

The idiot looked ready to wet himself.

"Uh…"

Minato's lower lip almost trembled.

"Your b—birthday…?"

It was when Kushina's turquoise eyes narrowed dangerously and her lips straightened to a thin angry line that Minato knew for a fact that he was absolutely, positively, one-hundred percent _wrong_ and the right answer came to mind.

"Wait!" he yelled. "No, don't kill me!"

Kushina shook her head at the stupidity of his request.

"I'm not gonna kill you, moron—"

"It's _Valentine's Day_!"

Fugaku promptly froze.

* * *

"I hate how you're just about a lucky bastard," Minato muttered as he walked down one aisle in the bakery Fugaku chose to go to. "I mean honestly, you score yourself a perfectly hot chick, and then what do you do? You forgot her birthday last year, _and_ your anniversary, and _now_ you've forgotten that tomorrow is Valentine's Day."

He heard the hot, pink-haired cashier gasp at the story, offended.

Minato turned to give her a dazzling smile and nod sadly.

"It's true," confirmed the blond, placing a hand over his heart.

"That poor girl," she murmured with her green eyes sympathetic. They narrowed down at Fugaku who was staring at a few boxes of chocolate, trying to decide which one was the best. "Don't get her chocolate, you moron!" The girl flicked her pink-colored hair over her shoulder. "For all the things you've forgotten, your girlfriend deserves something way better than _chocolate_."

Fugaku frowned.

"But she _likes_ chocolate."

The girl rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips.

Minato proceeded to check her out like the proper man he was.

"Seriously?" the girl asked, sounding very sarcastic. "_Seriously_?"

Fugaku rolled his eyes – what the hell was it with girls and saying 'seriously' all the time?

Seriously—

Oh.

God.

"Seriously," he muttered back forcefully. "If she likes chocolate, why shouldn't I give her that?"

She looked at Minato with a stupefied expression, to which the blond replied with a:

"I know, but we've done everything we can. He's just a lost cause—"

"Shut the hell up, idiot."

"Oi, don't call me an idiot in front of pretty girls!"

"What happened to saving your self for _Kushina-chan_?"

"There is nothing wrong with flirting, bastard, which you'd know if you weren't such a tight ass all the time!"

"I'm not a tight ass!"

"Your mom is!"

"What the hell?"

With a huff, the cashier rolled her eyes before slapping the table.

"Get out of my shop!" she roared, thoroughly annoyed with the two pretty, albeit _annoyingasfreakinghell_ boys.

Fugaku scowled at her, coming out of their childish fight with his dignity still surprisingly in tact.

"Hn, you can't kick us out—"

"Oh yes, I can!"

And with that said, the two were kicked out of the shop.

—Still without a present.

"Damnit!"

* * *

"He has a _mission_!"

"I know!"

"A _MISSION_!"

"I _KNOW_!"

"What is _wrong_ with him?!"

"I don't know!"

"I mean, _seriously_!"

"Seriously!"

"What kind of boyfriend forgets about Valentine's Day?!"

"Seriously…"

* * *

They had gone _everywhere_.

"Dude…"

All over Konoha.

"What kind of boyfriend forgets about Valentine's Day?"

Fugaku rolled his eyes and flicked a pebble at Minato's head, causing the blond to cry out painfully.

"Shut up."

The Uchiha grunted and sat down with a solemn expression on his face.

"You're _so_ doomed," Minato stated with a small snicker as he went to sit beside his friend on the bench. It was already dark and they both were smart enough to know that shops were closed even though they _still_ didn't find a gift. "Seriously—"

"Stop _saying that_!"

"—Mikoto is gonna kick your ass." He paused to thoughtfully scratch his chin. "No, she's just gonna dump you. No wait, she's gonna dump you, and _then _kick you ass. Or kick your ass, and then dump you… Meh, either way, she's gonna both kick your ass and dump you. I mean hey, if _I_ were a chick, and _I_ were dating you—"

"Which thank god you are not…"

"—then I would so just leave you."

Minato coughed.

"That is, of course, before or after kicking your ass."

Fugaku rolled his eyes and reached for another tiny stone.

"Mikoto wouldn't dump me over something so stupid."

And before the Uchiha could dodge, he was the one hit with a rock.

"Ha, and you call _me_ an idiot!" Minato mocked, waving his arms around. "I mean really, you basically chose a mission over her."

"Shut _up_," Fugaku bit out, his eye twitching.

With another throw of a pebble to Minato, Fugaku walked off—

A whole other mission in mind.

* * *

Mikoto woke up to the sound of pebbles hitting her bedroom window.

With a grunt, she glanced at the clock on her side table and saw in neon green, blaring lights—

11:59 PM

"Who the _hell_," she muttered into her pillow. She slapped the bed, still rather annoyed from the day's events.

_That stupid jerk! I cannot _believe _he had the nerve to choose a stupid _mission_ over _me_! I'm his freaking _girlfriend_! I have patched him up after missions and saved his ass and helped him and trained with him and so much freaking more_—

"Mikoto, open the window, damnit!"

Her dark eyes widened momentarily before narrowing to a furious glare.

Oh no, he did _not_.

She immediately jumped off the bed and stomped over to the window, pushing it up fiercely to stick her head out and glower at the Uchiha.

"_YOU_—"

"I know you're mad," he said, cutting her off. "But—"

"Mad?!" Mikoto screeched. "_Mad_?! Mad _so_ does not begin to cover it! Seriously, Fugaku, go away—"

"Would you just hear me out?" he asked.

Mikoto's fingers gripped at the ledge and if she only had the strength of a kunoichi like the great Tsunade-hime, she probably could have broken the piece of wood into little itty-bitty splinters. Or better yet, she could have ripped off of the house and thrown it at her forgetful boyfriend.

"Fine," she replied curtly. "What do you want—OH MY GOD!"

If Mikoto had not been a skilled and well-trained kunoichi – a newly positioned _jounin_, at that – then she most likely would have died at that very moment from being impaled with a kunai straight in the head. With her toned reflexes, she managed to duck down when she saw Fugaku flick the weapon into her room.

She shot up and growled at him, uncaring if the neighbors woke up when she unleashed her fury.

"YOU!" she screamed.

Mikoto smacked the ledge.

"YOU! WHAT THE HELL IS _WRONG_ WITH YOU—"

She grew even angrier when Fugaku had the gall to roll his eyes.

"Would you shut up for a minute and get the kunai?" he muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.

"OH, I'LL GET THE KUNAI!" Mikoto growled. "YEAH, AND THEN I WILL SHOVE IT UP YOUR—"

"Woman, do you ever stop being annoying?"

"DO YOU EVER STOP BEING A TOTAL JERK?!"

There was a moment of tense silence as they stared at each other from their different positions.

Fugaku broke the contact with a tired sigh.

"Look, I'm sorry I forgot Valentine's Day," he said. Fugaku scratched his head and shrugged. "Just…"

He sighed again.

"I'll see you in a few days, alright?"

And with that he left.

After watching him walk away, Mikoto turned around and picked up the kunai.

She promptly frowned when she found a note tied to it.

* * *

Mikoto,

Sorry I forgot.

You could've _said_ something.

But no, you had to go and be _annoying_ and let me forget.

I'll make it up to you when I get back, I promise.

I love you.

-Fugaku

* * *

Four days later, Mikoto was showered with chocolates, flowers and jewelry.

That of which including an engagement ring.

FIN


End file.
